THE day coming closer...

Well, I've been thinking of writing a new post for the past couple of days but decided against it.
Just to see whether I can get more of a hold on what I am actually thinking and why, and how to describe it.

However, analysing can only go so far... so here are my thoughts for the day...

My thoughts are pretty much all over the place and all of these feelings are wanting attention.
The first thing is: I suddenly realize how ruthless time is. Whether I want it or not THE day is coming. I can't stop the time, I can't slow it down and I can't keep hold of it
This is something that hit me like a brick wall 2 days ago.

You know...I have known for months this was going to happen but it always seemed far enough away...and now suddenly... it's almost here!
I know that I will miss my girl, that I will miss touching her, holding her, cuddling her and I want to keep hold of the memories and the feelings that we're having right now. When I hold her...
But I know this is not possible.

On the other hand I'm looking forward to doing all the fun stuff that I have planned, of stretching my own being and learning about myself. And I know I'm strong and I can do it and that she won't have to worry.

But...at certain times I feel sheer panic in my body a feeling of doom...

I guess all of this is part of it. Part of the learning experience. I KNOW I'm strong enough, I KNOW I'm going to have fun and in actual fact I KNOW that a month is gone before you know it...

To be continued!